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Topic: Thanks for the syndication |
Andy Alkaline
(GravityIsForSucker)
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Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/16/05 at 09:56:23 GMT |
Jos, thanks for putting my feed on the SiteLibrary Community Site 
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Blasphology 1007 - "Money can indeed buy happiness, but it will be heavily taxed."
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Jos
(jos)
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Re: Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/16/05 at 09:59:01 GMT |
You're very welcome 
It's a good addition to have some humor content. I wanted to have some, but I didn't like the way the comics newsfeeds were working so gave up on it. Yours is great.
Plus now maybe I'll remember to read them. Them's some good reading over there at your site.
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Andy Alkaline
(GravityIsForSucker)
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Member Since: 08/20/05
Forum Posts: 169
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Re: Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/17/05 at 13:33:08 GMT |
Maybe I need to create a feed for my Blasphologies? What do you think? What does *anyone* think? I'm not telepathic you know. j/k
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Blasphology 1007 - "Money can indeed buy happiness, but it will be heavily taxed."
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Jos
(jos)
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Re: Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/17/05 at 13:57:35 GMT |
I've been wanting to ask you about those. I'm intrigued. Do you have a database of them? A couple days ago, SiteLibrary was the top result for those. MentalDimensions was second.
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Andy Alkaline
(GravityIsForSucker)
Level 4
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Member Since: 08/20/05
Forum Posts: 169
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Re: Blasphologies
Posted on 10/17/05 at 14:33:15 GMT |
Even though I invented the word "Blasphology" and its plural form, I assume that SiteLibrary was first in Google since you're a much more established site, and it's finding the word "Blasphology" in my signatures here.
I don't have a database. I have a cgi program that displays random html.. I'll show you an excerpt of the text file it reads.
code:
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1013</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"I sometimes regret being offensive or politically incorrect. Accordingly, I'm making a resolution that my political correctness will begin when the government implements a similar policy."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1014</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"Interestingly enough, it doesn't appear that my ideas bother anyone. It's only upon the execution or implementation of those ideas that wreak havoc with one's senses."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1015</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"Reciting quotes from great people of history will not change the world, it will not cause great epics to be written, it will not facilitate in the creation of art, it will not erect architectural marvels, and it will not bring about poetry that makes one cry."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1016</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"Don't get in the habit of blaming others for your mistakes. At some point, you have to take responsibility for your own actions. You can start by questioning if your decision to get out of bed every day has been causing problems in your life."</font></blockquote>
So.. the text file is self-explanatory. I use a require statement to include the random text cgi script, which in turn reads that text file, pulls one out.
Whenever I edit one or create one, I edit two pages separately. That text file, and then my blasphologies web page. Eventually maybe I'll get better at things, and set it up so I only need to edit one file. For right now, having to edit two files don't pose too much of a problem for me.
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Blasphology 1007 - "Money can indeed buy happiness, but it will be heavily taxed."
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Jos
(jos)
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Member Since: 08/09/03
Forum Posts: 2638
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Re: Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/17/05 at 22:25:59 GMT |
That's neat. Can I syndicate your blasphemology texts on my bantychick.com site? I'm willing to copy over the text file if you don't have it printing out XML yet. I'd love to have a copy of it.
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Andy Alkaline
(GravityIsForSucker)
Level 4
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Member Since: 08/20/05
Forum Posts: 169
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Re: Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/18/05 at 04:00:23 GMT |
code: <div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1001</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"Some experiences are meant to be shared; others are meant to be
locked away in your mind, driving you to the brink of
insanity."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1002</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"If someone 'accuses' you of sleeping too much, remember that you're not a criminal. Simply reply, 'I'm tired.' or 'I'm conserving my strength and energy for old age.'"</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1003</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"You're only as smart as what you learn, minus what you forget. I
call that 'math.'"</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1004</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"Racial tolerance is a good thing, but if a person is prejudice against Nazis, would that be irony or hypocrisy?"</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1005</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"A joke is a reality which doesn't exist, but is loosely based on reality; I think <b>Reality Television</b> must be a sick joke and should be moved from it's current network to an <i>alternate</i> reality."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1006</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"You don't know what you've got until it's gone, therefore, you're better off never attempting to acquire it."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1007</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"Money can indeed buy happiness, but it will be heavily taxed."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1008</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"If you put a framed picture of yourself facing the front of your mirror, it doesn't imply that you're a narcissist; it indicates that you're an extremely thoughtful person who's very considerate of your mirror."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1009</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"I'm ecstatic now that I've achieved fame. Unfortunately, it's all in my own mind, and I'm still getting paid the same amount of money."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1010</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"There's a primary reason that the best revenge is to be successful; if you're arrested for violently attacking or killing your enemy, your incarceration will sour the sweet, sensuous taste of vengeance."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1011</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"If thy religion dictates that masturbation is a sin, bear in mind that it's only a sin because thy God created the decree. Pray thou that there will be a third Testament ("Old, New, Something Borrowed, Something Blue" perhaps), and the Lord thy God will change His mind <b><i>again</i></b>. After any amendments or changes have been filed, rejoice that thy prayer has been answered; finish thyself off without fear of thy soul or bodily fluids being eternally damned."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1012</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"It's a glorious thing that my poetry is so bad<br />
Women are assured I'm the author because the rhyme is so sad<br />
Not to worry, it's only a fad<br />
Don't kill me, Please! No, don't murder me! Don't be so mad!"</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1013</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"I sometimes regret being offensive or politically incorrect. Accordingly, I'm making a resolution that my political correctness will begin when the government implements a similar policy."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1014</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"Interestingly enough, it doesn't appear that my ideas bother anyone. It's only upon the execution or implementation of those ideas that wreak havoc with one's senses."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1015</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"Reciting quotes from great people of history will not change the world, it will not cause great epics to be written, it will not facilitate in the creation of art, it will not erect architectural marvels, and it will not bring about poetry that makes one cry."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1016</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"Don't get in the habit of blaming others for your mistakes. At some point, you have to take responsibility for your own actions. You can start by questioning if your decision to get out of bed every day has been causing problems in your life."</font></blockquote>
--NEXT--
<div class="Blasphology">Blasphology 1019</div><blockquote>
<font size="3">"Revenge is a dish that is best served by using the following recipe: thumbtacks and well-hidden shards of broken glass; mix well into a chocolate cake which looks deceptively appetizing. Serve cold or slightly chilled."</font></blockquote>
Usually I post new ones on Empty Dimensions, my supplement.
The reason there is a gap before 1019 is because I made two revenge ones right away, so set the second one to 1019 to space them apart.
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Blasphology 1007 - "Money can indeed buy happiness, but it will be heavily taxed."
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Jos
(jos)
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Re: Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/18/05 at 04:06:01 GMT |
Thanks! I copied them and will save them until I get a chance to put them up on my personal web site.
I would like to find out how to make a syndicate thing where you can post your new ones and have them automatically go in to a public feed. Or maybe you are already working on getting an idea of how to do that. I think it would be neat. Not often somebody comes up with something new and unique like that.
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Andy Alkaline
(GravityIsForSucker)
Level 4
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Member Since: 08/20/05
Forum Posts: 169
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Re: Blasphologies
Posted on 10/18/05 at 04:20:33 GMT |
This specific post can be deleted.
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Blasphology 1007 - "Money can indeed buy happiness, but it will be heavily taxed."
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Andy Alkaline
(GravityIsForSucker)
Level 4
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Member Since: 08/20/05
Forum Posts: 169
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Re: Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/18/05 at 04:24:59 GMT |
Jos wrote:
Thanks! I copied them and will save them until I get a chance to put them up on my personal web site.
I would like to find out how to make a syndicate thing where you can post your new ones and have them automatically go in to a public feed. Or maybe you are already working on getting an idea of how to do that. I think it would be neat. Not often somebody comes up with something new and unique like that.
I would add them manually. That's how I update the main rdf/rss feed for Mental Dimensions Humor Ezine.
It worked out greatly because I already had the feed from when I started with WebAPP. I had never created or had XML feeds before that.
This fellow at John Fanzine does something I hadn't seen yet; a lot of the links in his feed lead to the same page, but just anchor tags to #update. For Blasphologies, something like that might be what I'd do. They're just so short I wouldn't want a separate page for all of them.
Thanks for pointing out how unique they are, the fact it's not very often that's done, my creative genius, how much you respect and admire me, that you'd like to name/rename your first born after me... I don't know if I'm reading what you wrote correctly, or if I'm reading between the lines, or the last time I paid rent, but I always appreciate feedback. j/k
There may be another word for these. Maybe I should have looked it up first. "F***ed Up Quotes" would have been a good alternative. I've been thinking about a definition. But not too much.
Blas.pho.lo.gy (n), grammar 1. Short statement or quote which twists around a previously established idea. 2. Reverse logic, illogical for the sake of humor.
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Blasphology 1007 - "Money can indeed buy happiness, but it will be heavily taxed."
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Jos
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Re: Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/18/05 at 04:26:57 GMT |
I think it's a great word. I wouldn't change it now that you thought of it, published it, and got it indexed. I don't know about you, but if it were me that thought of it, I'd be looking forward to getting published in an upcoming edition of Websters.
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Andy Alkaline
(GravityIsForSucker)
Level 4
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Member Since: 08/20/05
Forum Posts: 169
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Re: Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/18/05 at 04:30:28 GMT |
I was thinking of that, publication in dictionary, but not sure if that could happen. Since the root word is Blasphemy, and suffix is ology, which essentially means "study of"...
So.. perhaps I should have put more thought into my word before inventing it, in order to ensure publication.
Oh well. There's already plenty of stuff in my mind that isn't real, or is wrong, guess I shouldn't lose any sleep over it.
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Blasphology 1007 - "Money can indeed buy happiness, but it will be heavily taxed."
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Andy Alkaline
(GravityIsForSucker)
Level 4
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Member Since: 08/20/05
Forum Posts: 169
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Re: Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/18/05 at 04:31:59 GMT |
Jos wrote:
Thanks! I copied them and will save them until I get a chance to put them up on my personal web site.
Have you figured out yet who the mysterious mad serial voter is, who always selects "4?"
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Blasphology 1007 - "Money can indeed buy happiness, but it will be heavily taxed."
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Jos
(jos)
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Re: Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/18/05 at 04:35:04 GMT |
Andy Alkaline wrote:
...
Have you figured out yet who the mysterious mad serial voter is, who always selects "4?"
No! Now I'll have to go look. I haven't had time to look much at that site for a while, especially the polls. Hmmm...
Maybe I have it set to allow multiple voting?
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Andy Alkaline
(GravityIsForSucker)
Level 4
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Member Since: 08/20/05
Forum Posts: 169
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Re: Thanks for the syndication
Posted on 10/18/05 at 04:59:06 GMT |
I did make a separate reply, on top of the last one. I do that sometimes if it's two things that are unrelated. It wasn't important, but I wasn't sure if you check that or not. There've been a couple times I did that, and it seemed to have been missed. Maybe coincidence.
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Blasphology 1007 - "Money can indeed buy happiness, but it will be heavily taxed."
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Thanks for the syndication
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